Great points and applicable! Thanks!

Brilliant! Thanks for sharing!

Thank you, that made a situation I am dealing with tolerable.

Great metaphor, Derek!

One of my 'transportation-themed' coping devices when entering a plane, train, or bus, packed with semi-lamenting, undernourished faces is to superimpose upon them a cabin, train, or car full of happy hounds, all with perfect posture, smiling back, enjoying the ride of their lives!

Simple like great song lyrics. Thanks for sharing.
Go for it! Make a song! If you do, I'll post a link to it here. — Derek

Love it !
Just what I needed, and timely as well !
Thank you 😊

It's so hard to put the blinders up and focus in today's world.

Thanks for the inspiration to say, "the hell with all you crazy people rushing around! i'm going my own pace thank you very much."

- CelloJoe

Thank you Derek!

Over the summer life gifted me with a quick series of heart attacks followed up by double bypass surgery and now, 4 months to the day as it happens, all is progressing well. Reading this I had to smile as this so aptly describes a number of changes, some optional and others not so much, that I have made to my life and pace to continue to enjoy being on the green side of the grass.

Thank you as always for perspective!

Great metaphor. Blocking out the noise to focus on what's important. Thanks.

too general to speak this mindset with having human revolution at hand. some could use your quote, yes, some will live with it to foster their comfort and lifestyle only based on what they have become for the rest of their lives. it may seem to me. we could all use "better" reminders from all around us to understand how and why it matters to think and care for others. learning to be better objective and managing the situation is one thing, but learning to tune people out completely im not sure about that and see it as possible consequence. because people are easy (look at how we vote, love, raise kids..)

You just cut-through to everything that is wrong in my life right now. I care too much and I feel the pressure of others intensely. I'm going to work on tilting my mirror and see how I go. Thanks Derek.

So beautiful Derek.

perhaps i should add, do you trust your readers that much, to know and encourage the direction they are driving? how will their actions be perceived by their fellow human creatures i wonder and imagine.

Such a beautiful 'Sivers' analysis- the 'Tilted View' approach.

So simple. So powerful.

Thank you for bringing us so much insight Derek.

Simple yet so true!
I found it very relatable, thank you Derek.

Very nice?

Hi Derek;

Always enjoy a read of these; reflection on things is what allows us to draw out any lessons in life, that may be there to draw out; reflections shared, after doing so ... are lessons shared.

Our drive, it seems, equates to our will ... which equates to our human energy.

Yes, perhaps it's only by slowing down sufficiently ... that we insert the pauses necessary to reflect well ... and thus draw out from our milieu and surroundings, inner and outer, the joy there to discover; forsaking, then, the energy zapping fast lane ... a good way to make room for the pauses; by its very nature, a slower pace allowing for the same.

Distracting thoughts, it seems, are more often than not imbalanced ones; yet they are still us ... in motion; which part(s) of us, well, only a pause for reflection might be able to reveal that; no pause(s), then perhaps we are driven on only by the distractions ...

That, rather than cultivating what supports our energies ... rather than drains them; reflections, in that case, engendered; reflections that nuggets of insight can come from.

LOL ... lots better, that, than speeding along adding and creating stress ... with a back seat to clean, to boot.

Happy driving then ... and know, too, that others in a hurry always appreciate when you pull over in the slow lane when passing lanes present; so, in that, some saving grace there ... as well.

All the best!

Cam

Very nice- thanks!

Oh Derek, as a Kiwi who is home for Christmas - all I can say is - you've got balls. Despite the analogy I know how impatient NZ drivers get. I might try something similar and report back!

Derek, great article, Need to hear this, you are in NZ? Find when I go back to where I was born, CHCH and drive some of those twisty roads get nervous and aware of the cars behind. Great idea to forget about them. THe drive from CHCH over to Akoara is amazing but sort of scares me with all the twists and turns and narrow road. Will remember this metaphor thank you.
Yes! Love little Akaroa, but that drive… Yeah, nah. — Derek

Wow! Was just having a conversation w/ my girlfriend about this problem only today on a walk. Nearly wanted to pack it in re: my business. Thanks for this :) I will drive slow!

I love the thought. Thanks for sharing. Similar to how plastic surgeons only have to change the face only a few millimeters to transform a face only a mother could love, to a face GQ wants to feature. :)

Yes I know what you mean and all the way to the smallest Atoms in my Brain and body.
I'm very prompt and rapid in all that I do and think about. For example, I have almost eighty CDs on my music Website, Islandfrank.com . these were put there in the last twelve years, and I can't stop. The only way I can slow myself down is teach several classes of Tai Chi several times a week. As you know that must be done very, very slowly while thinking out every move as accurately as possible for maximizing brain growth. Most of the people in my classes try to increase the speed of the moves, but they have to follow me and they are always thanking me for forcing them to slow down to my speed. It's not easy in this fast technologically growing world to slow down and enjoy nature and the Universe at night.

Thanks so much, Derek. I got something out of it before reading it. I wrote a song before I read the article and its a good thing I did. I had been distracted myself from writing with life for most of the year off and one. The title alone helped he write a new song.

Not only do I sympathize with the specifics of your dilemma (been there, almost crashed that), but I appreciate the metaphor as well. Keep on doin!

This exact same situation happens when my wife and I take a short walk from our house to a nearby Whole Foods. Once in a whilte, there will be someone on our heals (like today) and then I'll gently suggest to my wife that she should keep to the right and let the other person pass.

Next time, I'll try your strategy but don't know how I'll shun the footsteps behinds us from getting me distracted.

Motivation is delicate indeed =)

Another bite-sized gem! Reminds me a lot of the story you told on the Tim Ferris Show about riding your bike along the sea side, always racing. But when you slowed down it barely added any time. I love your take on things, you are a good story teller

Love it! 100% right. Thank you for sharing.

You're absolutely right about this, Derek!

I am highly motivated and that has been my talent, but every now and then I have a low point and I try to figure out what is weighing me down like a bad dream you can't recall in the morning!

When I figure it out it's usually a case of eliminating, somewhat like your mirror, the "mirrors" in front of me: the TV, computer screen, and the click impulse…the hundreds of bids to give you exposure as an artist, musician, the tools to protect what shouldn't have to be protected…always at a monthly cost which I can ill afford, realizing that your every move is GPSed, cookied, …at every turn and twist in the road I have slowly given over my world and privacy to that Minotaur Cloud or Ooglegoogle.

The slow realization that these mega-information piranhas store everything about everyone - and they are constantly swallowing up each other and will eventually be just one big holding company: who has the information has the power!

Only recently did I realize, for example, that the MS in MSNBC stood for Microsoft…MSNBC - that organ of the STATE! Think about it…it's frightening.

So in the last several years I have permanently turned off the television, Facebook - such an insipid, viscous medium this has turned out to be - I've never figured out how to extricate myself from it and since it does have a means to get in touch with many musicians and artists in my case -I'm still on, but rarely post and go for long periods of time without scrolling. Who needs the man in the street's opinion…and who's got time to tell someone how beautiful they are every time they change their photo…talk about throwing up!

It's fabulous…when you turn them off…they don't exist anymore and you have your world back and your time and your motivation…sort of…I don't look in the right side mirror because I know "they" are closer than they appear LOL!

Thanks Derek, this really made me smile. I could envision you entering bliss as you tilted that mirror.

In terms of my delicate motivation - I need to reflect more on how to provide that same treatment internally, with regards to my inner critic. Would be curious to hear your thoughts or thoughts from others here on how they tilt their 'internal mirror' on their critic. Cheers!

U nailed it here Derek. Tilt the mirror. Thank you!

So timely!

Just what I needed to fill my motivation tank going into the last month of the year. Thanks as always Derek!

What a coincidence! I was browsing Facebook, just to see once more what's new before I would quit my private profile and convert it into a Page, when I bumped into yours Derek and when I received your email with this blog post...

I began to feel the negative effects of social media more and more - in fact, two months ago or so I became physically sick after a debate on some hot and very devisive subject.

I shall see how the Page thing will work out, but it is already a relief to even think about that the distractions will be radically less.

Thanks for this metaphore.

The subtle art of not giving a f*ck. Reading it now!

Great!

Hi Derek,
I cried after I read this. I have to tilt my mirror.

I think your solution was better in many ways to the one I stumbled on ... which is/was the stimulant medication for my ADHD.

Prior to being diagnosed & treated, a typical drive on the freeway would consist of the following: freequent lane changes and changes in speed (if prone to car-sickness, you'd obviously hate me), glancing at the rear view mirror 50-65% of the time ... I'd hate the fact someone might be on my tail, and running constant Rain Man-like calculations in my head on how much time I had left and how much faster I'd get there if I went 15kmh faster... Even short hauls were affected ... totally irrational impatient impulsive acts like trying to speed through an amber light or giving the finger to someone who might have cut me off (even if it was only a 7 min drive, I acted as if it were life & death).

What ADHD stimulant medications do for patients like me is, when they work properly, they actually make me focused and provide an energetic sort of calm (for normal people, they're probably like speed which is why they are so often abused). When I first experienced it, I thought "shit! this is what 'normal' is!". Sure, I'd still look in my rear view mirror but only 15% of the time when needed. However, my speed was a safe constant - slightly above the maximum posted speed limit but nothing to worry about. Nor was I driving like Mr. Magoo.

I have friends who suffer from anxiety attacks - something kinda foreign to me...however, when I examined my driving style, I was struck by how much anxiety seemed to be embedded without me realizing it ... and how it affected those poor people unfortunate enough to be my passengers.

Hi Derek,

Great idea. I have the same problem driving to my favorite spots in the Blue Ridge Mountains. I sometimes pull over and let tailgaters pass or listen to an audiobook or music and flip up my rear view mirror to "night" mode.

Best,

Jim

NB - "New article that might apply to you" - Derek Sivers

Or everyone? ;-)

That story literally blew me away.🌸😊🌸

Great example and nicely explained.

Derek, an interesting idea. But it would seem that the reduced stress by turning your mirror is inversely proportional to the stress of the person immediately behind you, especially when they see that your rear-view mirror is doing anything but that. It's viewed as a sign of anti-social behavior.
It is definitely anti-social, yes. If trying to be socially acceptable is keeping you from getting where you’re going, then I think it’s OK to be temporary anti-social. It’s not actually harming anyone. — Derek

This was great and so timely. I always enjoy reading your writing. Thanks for sharing such simple and deep messages.

So YOU'RE that guy! Really, I agree with your premise and it is a timely reminder approaching the holiday season. Besides, "the first rule of Italian driving is, what's behind you is not important".

Derek

Love that metaphor.

Made me think - How often do we let other people dictate our choices, life is short, live your life, no one else can!

Best

Ian

I love this principle. In a similar vein if you don't make eye contact with a road raging driver 90% of their attack on your zen doesn't make it through. I always drive more slowly now but with driving as with life it is easy to fall back into the madness of the crowd.

Love it Derek yes we all need to adjust that 'mirror' and bring the attention back to 'ME' ……. great story!

Thank you for this article Derek. I have been going through a period where I haven't been achieving my goals. Very frustrating. I took stock, and simplified things and am feeling very good and hopeful. Your article re-inforced my process.

Excellent article and something I needed to read right about now as my motivation is diminishing on a current project. Thanks!

Or, you know what you're doing, you have a car set up for high speed turns and you pray nobody's in front of you. Last time I drove over Sonora Pass on the north edge of Yosemite I had a transcendental experience climbing nearly 5,000 vertical feet uninterrupted. No cars to break the dance that is mountain driving.

Hey Derek. As always I enjoy reading your thoughts and perspective on things. I have often found that in life you may be just one nap away or one meal away from changing your entire perspective on things.

What I mean by that it that circumstances too often dictate our mood and decisions. Think for example about the times when you go to a grocery store and find yourself ravenously hungry. What is the usual result? Yep grabbing way to many things, typically the least nutritious and highest fat and carb content.
Then guess what back to feeling over full, paying too much for things that you didn't necessarily need in the first place. Or how about when you are thinking about making a major purchase? How many times have we been way to stressed out and way to tired to be doing such a thing. Then you take a nap and your entire view has changed.

Motivation sometimes can change due to us allowing ourselves to overcommit to things that we need not do that too, only to find that our emotional and motivational tank is all used up.

I think that the bible says something really cool about this. They call is "Selah". It is a moment to pause and reflect. I believe you will find this in the psalms. I think we all need to do this way more. In fact me writing this little ditty is a "Selah" moment for me.

Well anyway, that is my 2 cents on the subject. Always great hearing from you Derek!

Thanks, Derek! Really needed this.

Great one! Haha, I have been doing the same thing-tilting my rear view mirror up when cars get close to me or their lights are too bright!

Hello Derek,

Great thoughts. In his book Deep Work Cal Newport talks about the need for removing distraction. We often care too much about things that doesn't deserve too much care.

I recently adopted the process of putting my phone on flight mode for concentration and focus for most of the morning. Works great.

Hope you are doing well.

Bappy

Thanks Derek. Just what I needed to motivate me into playing again

I live in the winding mountain roads of VT. I get it!

Proof of why we need to be convinced of what is important. If we do not have this conviction, if we do not have a solid foundation, then we are tossed from side to side, reacting to fear and emotion.

Great story! Great example!

The other side of the mountain is always best.

In Greece, one can see trucks with the word "Metaphora" written on them. In Greek, "metaphora" means, in this instance at least, "to transport". The trucks are moving vans.

Might have some metaphorical connection to your circumstance.

Cheers!
Cool! Love it. Thanks for posting this. — Derek

Brilliant. I want to be as clear and concise in my writing and the way I think about life as you are Derek. Seriously making it a goal for next year. Thanks for your posts.

I needed this kick. I just couldnt finish my assignment in deadline because I spent time doing something else all this time. I was feeling so bad about how stupid I am. Now I need to kick myself to get going. Thanks a lot

small variation - big difference, thanx derek for sharing :)

Very much a timely reminder, Derek.

"He who looks in rear view mirror does not see future." ~ Fortune Cooke :: "Be in a hurry to where? One might ask. Be in a hurry to nowhere, and one will arrive on time." ~ Anonymous. || Life offers a scenic route. Take the time to enjoy it. ... Just my two cents. :)

Simple. Easy. Excellent. Thanks.

I freaking laughed out loud when I got to the bold of your blog post. It was really cool seeing that I'm not the only one with that anxious feeling! I get like this on the freeway and on this single-lane road near my home - exactomundo!

The good news though, especially for overly concerned people like us is that we got self-driving cars coming-up in the near future!

Totally get this metaphor and couldn't come at a better time.

Thanks for the pick me up! I feel you Derek!

Cheers.

A large portion of the critical individuals is either a lack of interest or just plain jealously - many of those close to you really don't want you to succeed because it can make them feel insecure. So you are correct sir - just adjust your personal viewer and keep your eyes on the road of success. Have a great Holiday

Derek,

I'm similarly afflicted with worry about others' opinions of me, both in virtual and physical reality.

At times, I feel so weighed down by my worries that I actually try to solve every problem AT THE SAME TIME. Which, of course, only leaves me drained and feeling less accomplished than ever.

The metaphor of tilting the mirror, even when it's just me alone with my thoughts, is a nice one, one which I will revisit when it comes time to shut out the fear and just focus on one thing at a time.

Thank you. This helps.

Damian

I guess what you are trying to say is don't let people or things try and stop you from what you want to do. In the past I have heard people say "That's really hard" or "I don't know about that" and the usual one "You know what people are saying." Then I feel like saying "Where are the people.

Well done short story/metaphor....thank you, Derek!

A risky metaphor, because there's risk you may miss some critical bit of information occurring in your wake. But I get it.

YES. THIS.

I found myself doing a version of this earlier today.

I found myself getting pinged a lot through my phone onto my PC where I was doing some program writing for a client.
I kept glancing down at the notification and this broke my train of thought every time. So I literally disabled my internet 'tilting my own mirror' forcing myself to finish the programming.
I adjusted my environment and I was better for it.

Thank you Derek.

Loved it, Derek!

Thanks for the story Derek! It'll help me illustrate to others how we may focus on working "in the way that suits you best".

Love it! And its great for a Monday morning in particular!

sometimes it's the simple solutions that get us unstuck and that is exactly what this is. There is deeper meaning if you want but mostly just assess the situation, plan accordingly and move forward while enjoying the moment. Thanks Derek!

I absolutely love it. Such a minor life changing adjustment, that can bring about extremely beneficial results! Keep up the great work Derek.

P. S. I was so sorry to hear about the earthquakes that hit your home area and had made you have to relocate to Singapore!! I hope and pray that you are doing Okay.

Sincerely,

Edward Allan Moore

This is exactly why I decided to only check my email twice a day at work. I was getting to distracted by the incoming messages/demands of the other 'cars'.

Awesome advice Derek.

Loved it!

If you're talking about Crown Range Rd between Wanaka and Queenstown... I understand your sentiments completely.

This was perfect and lovely all at the same time. Thank you - grateful for you and your perspective!

You did it again! Simple and beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I will now tilt my rear view mirror up as well!

"Tilted Mirror". I just started a band after a 25 year hiatus. Sounds like a good band name. Thank You

Thank you for the reminder! Besides the constant awareness of others' needs and wants, which is only there because of my own need to please, appease, and provide, I need to tilt the mirror on the past. It's hard to enjoy the journey when you're stairing at what lies behind you. Again, thank you!

Thanks for sharing. Funny how little shifts in focus make can make a difference, but I think the key of this story, for me anyway, is the little ways we listen to ourselves. "Why am I getting stressed on this trip? Am I bothered by creating a challenging trip for my son? Why does the irritated cars behind me bother me so much?" Nice to share those little moments of questions and the little answers of adjustments and going at your pace, and how that makes all the difference. Seems like tilting the mirror was your way to handle one part of the stress. Reminds me of all my little distress tolerance tricks I've developed over the years. Some days they seem silly, some days stupid, some days they save my life. I always appreciate your work, and the way you share it.
Thank you,
Desi

Excellent! Great reminder to not let the naysayers affect you as you strive to achieve your goals. Even more important, don't let your own self-doubt tell you that you are wasting your time. The good thing about tilting the mirror is that you can't see others, but you also can't see yourself.

The story makes you think! When I was a new teacher, I use to spend much time every day in prayer and meditation and thinking about how I could motivate the students better. I always thought that students should want to behave and learn because learning together was fun. Gradually, I learned to to work with the students in such a way that we learned a lot and had fun together. Motivating them motivated me. Sometimes helping others is the best way to help yourself.

Love it Derek! I needed this so much. Thanks for sharing. Allie

I like to drive on a certain graveled, winding mountain road that is really dangerous as hell. On one side is a sheer cliff up, and the other a sheer cliff down. I often see tow trucks pulling cars out of the woods where they landed after going off the side. I could just as easily take the interstate, but I dislike it intensely. I've had a few close calls when a truck comes barreling around a curve and we both have to swerve to avoid one another. At the time, I had a red Honda CRX, which was a lot more fun to drive than, say, a pickup truck. Once my CRX died, I decided not to venture on the road again. My current vehicle is a Honda wagon, and not suited to daredevil stunts. Also, at age 74, I seem to have outgrown my urge to take chances, and I dislike driving fast as well. In fact, I'm most content when my wife does the driving. I suppose that's what's known as being 'retired'.

Hey Derek, you probably don't remember me but i was one of the early guys to join CDBaby. I do steel pan music in Hawaii. In the last two years the whole music scene has changed for the worse. Long story, just let me say from the merchants and gig providers that they can't prove music equals sales so they are mostly DJ's or a guitar guy who can sing well and knows every song in the universe on request but must play for tips that amount to about $20 for 3 hours on a really good night.

So, my motivation to play and record has gotten up and gone. Don't much enjoy playing at home for fun either.

This is a long way to get to a short comment: Thanks for your emails brother.

Simplicity, integrity, and a parable for today.
What I like best about your stories, videos, etc.
is you see humanity for the gift it is. That's
a treasure.

A minor tweak to your tweak, tilt the mirror down and watch your kids gaze at the sights. The small sliver of time we are entrust with our children should be cherished and not taken for granted. Seeing the amazement of a child out shines any other view.

Great to read, "there's a passing lane every few minutes.....", as I was worried about your safety!

That's really true

Great post! Something that seems so simple yet so hard to do. Thanks for the powerful story and reminder.

Beautifully illustrated, Derek. Thanks for sharing.

You always encourage me!! Brilliant as usual.

The drive you describe sounds like Christ Church to the Giants House in Akaroa. Have you met Josie Martin? Let me know if you have, I may have a proposition for you....

There is zero anti social about your looking forward. Living your life at your pace is your concern alone. It is not as if you were driving 35 on an American Interstate through Montana. Any one who has been to New Zealand knows that newbies to the terrain need to drive slow and focus on the road ahead and keep it under 50 kph. I drove the circumference of the entire South Island last November and I know exactly where you are coming from.

We hired a boat in Fijordland and the chef donned scuba gear, jumped overboard and presented us with four football sized lobsters which we had for dinner. Best meal I've ever had...I envy your time in New Zealand. I hope you make it to Wellington and the Anzak Gallipoli presentation there. Peter Jackson's company made all of the models. It is spell binding.

Thanks as always for sharing your thoughts and observations.

Kindest regards,
Ross

jacob, sounds dangerous to drive looking in your rear view mirror, with it pointed toward your back seat. What if your child is making a silly face? You will continue to look, maybe making one back at him, as you drive off the cliff to your death.

Derek, reminds of my many drives to Dallas from Tulsa. The great highways made it tough for me to stay under 85 and often was pushing 95mph. Speed limit 65 or 75.

When parents complained, explained if I'm going faster than the normal traffic, I lessened our chance of collision. I only had to worry about what was going on in front of me. Slower speeds, made all four sides potential collision points.

I DO GET THE METAPHOR.
Whatever you are doing; do it at the pace that makes it BEST for you.

Appreciate your wisdom. And your sharing. Thank you!

I always wonder why we are so hard wired to please everyone even at our own peril. I fall prey to this feeling all the time. I have a tradition that has helped me greatly, "If you succeed and are able to please everyone in the neighborhood, know that you are a hypocrite." Thanks for providing content worth my time to read! May you and your family be covered with peace, happiness, and security.

I believe in what you wrote. I also believe in tiliting the mirror on opportunities within the realm of possible memorable memories. It sucks that we have to abide by our ingrained worry to be accepted socially while worrying if we're intruding on their happiness. Well you know what Derek too fuckn bad. Like you say, if you say you don't have time then you're out of control with your time. My point is most people aren't even aware of what their doing let alone have the time to have the patience to reflect on happiness.

So good!

Thank you. Best reminder I've had in a long while.

Hey Derek,

Welcome back. If you find the Rimutakas stressful I suggest that may you ought not try the Akatarawa hill road. But then again on that road, no one can drive fast.

Driving home over the Rimutakas I like to keep my rear vision mirror down so that I can look back at the Wairarapa, because that's the place that I came from.
Ha! I do Akatarawa Road monthly to go to Staglands! It doesn't have the stressful traffic, but my kid puked twice on that road, too. ☺ — Derek

Thank you. This helps.

Derek! I always love your simple actions / profound insights. Will definitely use the story in my talks

Derek,

Always appreciate your insight and thoughts.

You should also add "Philosopher" to your title.

Something I thought about while reading your stuff today.

My neighbors came knocking on my door at 3:22 AM. Fortunately I was playing the drums at that time and heard them knocking.

I've been driving this way for years. I always keep my rear view mirror pointed down just enough so if I do wish to take a peek I need to bend my upper body down a bit. But I rarely feel the need to ever look behind me. My wife complains about the tailgaters when she drives and for me they don't even exist because I never see them. Great idea Derek and I'm happy you're sharing it.

Thank you. Really great advice.

Great stuff, thanks for writing your thoughts and sharing with us. you truly rock.

Yup, it's because of stuff like this that I appreciate Derek Sivers. (Also, that appears to be a gorgeous drive)

This is very relevant. I have gotten good at eliminating distraction, but where it creeps in is actually during my morning meditation when I think of things I need to do. But I push it out of my mind and meditation is an ok place for this to happen.

I like this, Derek, though applying it is not so easy. Tilting the rear-view mirror is one thing, but getting discouraging feedback on important stuff is not something we can easily ignore--and maybe we shouldn't. Whenever I get discouraging info, if it has any credibility, I have to consider it, and try to figure out if there's anything I should learn from it. Then, I can move on a little stronger. BTW, I would feel exactly the same on that drive--and you found a good solution for that one, at least!

The Wairarapas?
Yup. The Rimutakas between Wellington and Wairarapa. — Derek

Derek, good to read and remember the importance
of one's own jouney. I use to care what people
thought, said, both are now tilted. I care what I
think and it is proven to be good for me. Tilting
your mirror is a good metaphor.
Thanks as always, Willie

It is crazy how more often then not it is the simplest things that can make all the difference. I think this serves as a reminder that it's okay to go your own pace and speed.

This story could very well change my entire life.
Thanks again, Derek.

Hey Derek,
Well written post as usual---since this is a metaphor and you are not doing this in real life(?) is there a danger in tilting your mirrors---driving without review/side view mirrors?
Thoughts People?

Thank you Derek. How timely! Just today I was lamenting to a friend that although I had made a ton of progress on my interview project it wasn't progressing fast enough. She said, of course it is fast enough because you set your content. Only you decide. No one else! It's your baby. Soon it will be a toddler. We love toddlers!

Great point!! Or, as my daughter says regarding my sometimes distractedness, having a bad case of FOMO (fear of missing out).
I'll practice tipping my mirror.
Thanks!

Beautifully said and to the point; love your sense of humor too Derek. Will have to mull this over as well. Gracias.

I can relate, when I worked at my very first job as an 18 year old, I learned this lesson.
I worked in a mall branch of a bank as a teller, because it was a mall branch, it was extremely busy with long lineups. The fact that it closed at 3 for an hour for balancing and would re-open at 4 made it even worse. You should have seen the crowds waiting like hungry cranky lions! I panicked every time and I felt compelled to rush but no matter how I rushed the line kept getting longer. It made me hate going to work, I would daydream of creative reasons why I could call in sick. What had started out as a nice job with pretty good pay and opportunity to learn a lot about how the banking system worked turned into my worst nightmare. I was so stressed by trying to rush through the line that I had trouble balancing and I made stupid mistakes. All I could see was that endless line. Obviously I had no mirror to tilt but I adjusted my attitude a little- ok, so what if they have to wait? Since the line wasn't ever getting any shorter I decided to relax into it, converse a bit with the clients and try to enjoy the job. It made all the difference because I balanced and no longer had to stay late:) I was lucky I learned the lesson early in life:) I was so smiley and pleasant that people weren't even mad at me for taking my time, in fact customers often waited so they would get me as their teller! Big lesson! Stress never helos and it is all about attitude!

I really like this Derek. Simple and effective. What a great reminder to concentrate on what's important in life and not let unnecessary things get to the top of your give-a-s**t list. :)

Thanks for sharing this!

A gem
Lovely parable
Perfect solution

Love this idea! I always like to turn my mirror up because life is too short to risk it all.

It's learning how to take care of yourself. Nice reflection.
Reflection! Ha! ☺ — Derek

guess you're talking about the Rumataka's. I think everyone who lives in this wonderful country might already had their mirror tilted. Just some don't know it.

Heya DS. Reminds me of San Marcos Pass, CA 154 above Santa Barbara, shortcut to my family home in Santa Maria. I go fast since I've been doing it for 40 years. But I use the turnouts too. Then of course, the coast route via Gaviota on the 101 is great too.... :^)

Another gem, thanks for sharing Derek!

What a lovely metaphor, I could see it coming but as I read it to my mum she didn't see it coming so ... lovely!!! And has prompted yet another lovely conversation. xx

Brilliant. Off to tilt my mirror :) Thanks, Derek!

We are delivering free pianos to children and families who have no resources. My driver, who as far as I know has never needed to have a job, yet is happy to volunteer for me because, he doesn't get paid, no one tells him what to do, and he gets to drive a truck, is lining up traffic on his way to our next delivery of 9 pianos. I look in the rear view mirror, then at the odometer. He's driving at 40 mph on a 55 while doing yoga poses at the wheel. I say, "Steve, we have a line up behind us, maybe you should pull to the side to let them pass." He says, "how many do we have?" I say, maybe 10. He says, let's wait until we have 15, then I'll pull over. Once we hit critical mass, there are people flipping us off, etc. And Steve says, "Man, why so angry?"

Why indeed. We were just giving away pianos.

I've started doing this about six months ago but never thought about putting it into words. Great job!

Love this one Derek. It drives home the value able point that very small subtle changes can have huge impact if we can remember to look out and become aware of such opportunities. A recent example of this in my life was buying a second cell phone so I can separate work from my personal life. At work, personal is off. At home, work is off. It's been very helpful.
Nice hack! Great idea. — Derek

Dear Derek,
I never listened to other horns blowing. I have achieved what others think is impossible. Because of my work, Max Kowalski's entire series of 17 lost song cycles is now on the web through CD Baby and it's affiliated digitals. My group has done a 2 CD recording of 81 tracks of all his works, this was done by June 4th, 2016 which is 60 years after his death on June 4th, 1956. All of his music that was lost is republished, because of my work. People in Europe are singing his music again because of a few well known performers who had seen my articles and heard of my research. Now, other performers are doing the same. I know that I did something with my accompanists and two other singers that I worked with, that undid some of the most horrible acts of censorship in human history, that of the Third Reich's Musik Entartete (forbidden music) that censored not only musical works but visual and literary works of the Jewish people in Germany. But this is not only Jewish music, it is simply lovely German lieder on so many genres of poetry because the composer was in love with all the styles of poetry of so many cultures. In several years from when I started, I had not only found the lost works of this composer throughout USA and Europe but in 2000, when lecturing in London, I found his daughter, who became my friend and a few years later, when she died, left me all of her father's originally published works but another 100+ songs in manuscript. I feel deeply honored that she knew I would make sure his music would be heard again throughout the world as it should have been. I thank you and CD Baby for making it possible for me to be able to do this, having to have done each of these CDs as physicals could have taken me many more years and the cost would have been prohibited. I was able to do the impossible because of the company you created. I will never forget meeting you in NYC and how you remembered my own original jazz cd titled "Blue" you remembered it because of the picture that looked like a Picasso done by my daughter. I have just done a remix of the "Three Songs of the Sea" from Blue. Hope you will go to my Host Baby website and see and hear it. Thanks, Suzi More
http://mysuzimore.com/listen/

Thanks I needed that

I used to take the phone with me when I walked the dogs. Not so much anymore. I pay more attension to the dogs, have more fun. I live on a beautiful island but was forgetting to appreciate the scenery, nature and peace of this place.
It's better without the phone for peace of mind break

Hi Derek,

You might enjoy this article, which is another take on the problem:

http://endurancefreeliving.com/the-myth-of-the-open-road/

All the best

Richard
☺ — Derek

One of the great things about the passage of time, if we are still alive, is that we have had many introspective moments and their cumulative effect is positive. Reading your metaphor and several of the responses reminds me of the experience of writing poems. The writer always says more that is intended or even recognized. Often, it is the reader who sees more and what we see is likely in the context of our own lives. My focus is usually aimed at social justice and equality, ideas which are bothersome for some, but not to me. So I think a lot about the relationships among us. I found something else there--you and your son, knowing he might throw up, but that not deterring either of you from the trip, from being together. I saw you, a father with his son, in a whole new, pleasant way. I also thought over a story I wrote last week for radio broadcast, about a family whose learning disabled children were put into foster care because the parents are both disabled and don't have enough income to pay housing deposits, though they can pay rent. I told their story in the context of the stories of Helen Keller and Stephen Hawkin. So much depends on happenstance, factors beyond our control. So it behooves us to take hold and control of our lives as much as we can.

Motivation is always delicate and precious because it is the driving force to creativity. Tweaking the mirror is excellent. Thank you
I love how simply you communicate such helpful ideas.

Yes, Derrek.
You're absolutely right.
Energy flows where attention goes. In order to be able to accomplish something, we need to focus on it without distractions.
Also, there are internal destructions, which are subconscious monologues.
We don't pay attention to it, but this is what actually leads us to our actions, which sometimes, we can't explain. This are our blueprints that "push" us to do things in certain ways.
We have to listen to internal monologues and hear what's going on there. Only after changing a subconscious program can we change our outer world.

Awareness - also on the small daily habbits. Great.

I already started to do that. Thanks to you. Our discussions out of your website made me aware of many things, like what you mention here. Thanks Derek!

Great reminder! Thanks for that nugget of wisdom!

Just what I needed, thanks

Derek

Where is the mountain and do you still live there?

You're an interesting bloke. How much time do you spend looking at computer devices all day?

I feel that mankind is infected with digital media where we think it is useful but outside of medcine and machines it is useless for us...maybe ok for making money for some and the I wanna make money for others; however, I think it will make us all very ill soon, mentally and physically.

Mobile phones are good for pick pockets though - all those distacted people living somewhere else but the present. Mmmm maybe a good vocation...

Thank you, Derek. This, and many of your other essays and articles, are incredibly inspiring and helpful. I don't usually comment because by the time I do, there are usually thousands of comments and by that point, many of folks have already said what I would say and probably in a better way.

This is also a time of year (that is, the Holiday season) where, while people are often nicer on the surface, when we're engaged with others in a non-personal way such as driving, many of us still tend to be impatient. I know all too well the feeling of having someone on my tail, wanting to do the best to keep from inconveniencing them while also wanting to make sure that my family and I are safe. I often wish there was an easy way to tell them "I know you want to get by me and I'd like to help you do the same, but I've got to do the best to stay safe for myself and my loved ones." If you can invent that, Derek, please sign me up for one of those!

All the best to you and thanks again for sharing your thoughts.

Nice post. Any tips for tilting the mirror?

Charming post! Now I'm curious: how does the view on the other side look like?

Oh yeah! I do that with my credit card bills all the time... they are so high, so i just ignore them till forever... :) jk

really cool perspective. funny how most of the stress we feel is because we feel other people are watching us and are disapproving. reminds me of this talk
http://tinyurl.com/qe7eoch, essentially airline pilots run into turbulence all the time, You would think the natural thing to do, is speed up, to get through the rough spots quicker, but typically the best thing to do is to slow down through it all.

Thanks for continuing to make great things!

So simple, and so true! I love it. Thanks, Derek :) x

I have some mirrors to tilt and I will start right away, one mirror at a time... Thank you, Derek!

Love it!
Most people spend a significant amount of time and energy worrying about what other people think, which rarely has an impact on how others actually think about them!
Make the tweaks that work for you to be happier. Perhaps setting this example is the best way to "impress" others if that's what's important to you :)

i live on top of the mountain range.
don't go down unless i have to. the
view's pretty good from here, and it
is nice and peaceful away from the
frenzy in the valley. wild boar dig
up the soil at night outside my gate,
and some nights they go trotting through
the village. it gets pretty windy sometimes
with the weather coming off the sea, but
home is a fortress against the elements.
the van is a good climber, there's a method
to maintaining optimum momentum without
taxing the brakes or changing gear too
often, it would be foolish to drive too
fast because you don't get up any quicker,
ands i educate those who follow me, and
give them a comfortable drive up the hill.
no, i don't get to take my eyes off the
road, and there are no passing lanes, and
big trucks sometimes come thundering round
the corner, going much too fast, or boy
racers overtake on blind corners. it's
pretty useful to know what's coming up behind
you, but you can't keep everyone happy; if
they have to wait, they have to wait. best to
keep your eyes on the road though. have a walk
sometime, much nicer than that driving a car trip.
have you noticed you don't walk anywhere anymore?
what a joy, to leave the car at home.

You read what's in my mind. I realise that I have to focus on my goals but I feel discouraged very quickly when I received negative comments from people or when I see myself behind anyone else's acheivement. I still have this problem of caring about what others thinks about me. It is stressing and distracting for me!

Great article! In addition to limiting distractions, I also took onboard to slow down a bit and do a more considered job as it pays off in the long term.

Great. Thank you.

Haha! Me and my girlfriend had the same experience minus visiting country towns in England, Ours was due to a the old, crap car we bought that goes up hills at a snails pace creating a trail of cars behind us. I just tell her it's an great opportunity to "sit and accept that awkwardness" :D

Simple tweaks can be so powerful. Thanks Derek, I always look forward to reading your musings!

Hi Derek,
If i can walk? then i don't drive even if it takes me a good hour. I think better on my feet.Thank you for your thoughts.

Hilarious! This is the first blog that I've read of yours Derek....and I have done the same thing for years, just driving in traffic in Vancouver. It stressed me out always having people tailgate me, so I erased that stress by pointing my center mirror upwards...and now they don't exist.

And I make sure that I don't watch people go by me either, eliminates another potential stressor. :)

Looking forward to your future posts!

Great piece! I would add a warning billboard on the back window with the saying:
"Be patient and enjoy the view as I am doing this right now. Have a peaceful day!"
Or:
"I'm slow because my kids throw up in these curves"
Or:
"In a hurry? Go fishing!"

If anyone come up with creative phrasing, please share!
Cheers!

Hi Derek,

I share it on one of my facebook pages

best regards
jan

cheers mate it has been sometime.i trust your good, a totally crap year that seems to get worse every turn.always appreciate your helpful hints

Good advice Derek.

Bang on. Good one!

Intersteing i have 2 subjects in common here

1) i have sold a painting to California named facing the Mothership - an abstract based on parellelograms and territory. Glasses , car windows and rear view mirrors are all these shapes and lap top screen become this if one adds perspective.

2)I have inherited a mountain in Northern Translavania , if one googles Vlad s Island the lake my land overlooks is the one with the curved Damn image- a superior view of the best looking/ appealing lake in Northern translavania- a state of the art hotel was built there 3 k.m away last year so i would love to create a thermal spa and dentistry/ joint rehabilition / art collection and residence and great bands for weddings already knowing a personnel friend who plays in Phantom of the Opera who would fly over for special occasions as he is Greek orthodox and would like to discover the architecture and culture.
My artist name is lawnspeak and works well so perhaps the venture could be Lake Speak as a view point of the lake would be the focal point .

I've did it many times!! And it really is helpful..

Oh My - you're just lovely. Sara

Powerful! I'll be pondering this for weeks.

Have you ever considered getting a bumper sticker which reads "I drive slowly so my kid doesn't throw up"? I think the traffic behind you would understand. :)

(Yes, I know this post isn't just about the driving...).

I think you are going for something different here but I couldn't help noticing that we all have powerful narratives that narrow our choices and focus our relationship to things and people. If you had maybe imagined that everyone behind you was relived that finally someone was driving slowly and had been longing for someone to take the burden off them for driving more slowly you would have created a different relationship to the community of drivers behind you and potentially their story about being the first follower (oh wait you know about that) ... I think you know this as we all do but is hard for us all to inhabit our dream and realise its already here... we have a song called Already There .... happy to share it where would be best?

Derek-So ironic that "tilting my mirror " arrived in my in box when it did.
Today I needed a perspective reminder to get my wheels turning. The answer to the problem was quite simple. Thank you.
TG

Once again, An amazing metaphor. The funny thing is that it's the only reasonable (or should I say "heart-able" and soulful thing i chose to do when driving anywhere off the highway, opting for the "scenic route". Tilt the mirror! I used to call it "lose the mirror." I like yours better ... as after a while I will be needing the mirror again! Derek, keep up the great work.

philip

Delightful, I could imagine the scenic drive as you talk about it, and your feelings. A personal experience expressed in a short & sweet narrative.

So true, I could feel the line of impatient drivers behind me as I read this. Doing some tilting today. Cheers

Hi Derek,

I enjoyed you story. I completed my first triathlon this year and loved it although I'm not very fit. I've given myself the challenge of completing the same event next year (Brownlee Triathlon in Yorkshire, England) in 59 minutes (I did 1 hour 14 mins this year). However, although I'm committed, something is holding me back. I'm not sure if I don't believe I can do it, or if it seems too far away or I just don't want it enough. I'm going to 'tilt my mirror' by taking one day at a time and enjoy the journey as well as the destination. Thanks Derek.

Ken

Woah, needed this!
Here I go, up over the mountain.
Thank you, thank you.
-kc

I deal with all of this every day. I'm going to now tilt my mirror!

Excellent article.

In fact, I had an employee that was so distracting that I chose to work from home all summer. Not ideal but couldn't block out the chatter. She's since left and I'm all cozy back in my lovely office.

Thanks, Derek!

Kate

good idea. when we went to Ga. we had a road just like that. and to and cars,
just like that. thanks for the idea. we'll have to try that the next time.

Tony Cestaro

It's a metaphor, definitely, but not a particularly good one. First you need to know both where you have been and what is behind you. Second, perhaps your children are too young for a dangerous drive. You may have deflected your own anxiety, but if it contributes to the aggression of drivers behind you, you won't be any less dead if there is an accident. My suggestion, drive the route when traffic is least if you want to enjoy it at a leisurely pace. Get the kids up at dawn, if you have to, they'll complain, but it's the kind of thing they will always remember, and therefore appreciate more, later. I have driven many such roads in the Rockies and Tetons, it is an ordeal and sometimes a dangerous one. It is not a casual undertaking, even if you do it every day.

"Slow down, you move to fast. Got to make the morning last. Skippin' down the cobble stones... feelin' groovy." -Some Band I Can't Remember
Simon and Garfunkel — Derek

Thanks for sharing this.

Yes it's way too easy to become distracted. I used to be someone who would drive like a bat out of hell every day to work (I work construction as my day job and often commute long distances to the site). The moment I'd get into my truck my head would start racing to go faster faster faster! This means that instead of taking in all the great ideas that could pop into my head on the drive, I'd be so worried about cops and if the people ahead of me were going "too slow" (AKA the speed limit).

After I got TWO speeding tickets in one day a couple months ago--one on the way to work and one on the way back--I havent sped since. My drives are much more pleasant now, and it's entertaining to watch the impatient people get pissed off behind me when I'm going "too slow" (AKA the speed limit).

I've taken it as a very expensive lesson to've learned.. But it was one I really did need help on!

Derek,
Great story mate. I love the analogy and have done a similar thing while driving up a range in Cairns North Queensland. It is great to get the kids the top without being sick and perhaps we actually help the driver's behind us to take a moment to enjoy the view. In a similar vein I once hired a motorhome in New Zealand and had to take it into a garage in a small town in the South Island to get the indicator fixed. As I waited for the indicator to be fixed, I was blown away by the amazing landscape, in particular the majestic mountain which framed the skyline behind the mechanic shop. I commented to the mechanic on how amazing it must be to have such a beautiful backdrop to his workplace. He glanced up with the mountain range in Offerton unconvincing "yeah it's great" while focusing on his task. As I drove away from the mechanic shop I pondered how it could be that while living in such a beautiful place, that mechanic took No value at all from his environment. On that day I resolved that I would always appreciate the environment in which I lived every day of my life. I would never be that mechanic.

Thank you, Derek, I can related to this living on this 12 mile long island which takes about one hour from tip to tip. :) https://media-cdn.tripadvisor.com/media/photo-s/0b/eb/33/18/map-of-st-john.jpg In addition to not looking back (we have no passing lanes) I play Bob Marley music to relax while driving on the left.

Just the perfect reading for Monday morning! My mirror no longer are looking backwards which will allow me to look forwards!

I can't say I've ever tried the mirror trick, though I found myself feeling stressed on a drive home last night when the car behind me had incorrectly adjusted headlights that were blinding me with the reflection in the rear view mirror.

One hugely valuable change I made a couple months ago was to go cold turkey on watching or reading the news. Unless you live in cave it's impossible to avoid 100% but if something really important happens somebody will tell you. In practice 99% of the news is inaccurate and most likely something that doesn't even affect you.

It takes a lot of will power at first to stop constantly checking the news but I have been rewarded by much better concentration and less anxiety in general. Basically I get more done now and I seem to make better decisions when some stranger on the TV isn't telling me I should be afraid of everything...

I use the same trick when I am being tailgated. Last year I suspected Facebook was pulling me down, so in January I started looking at it only on Sundays. Life is better. I wrote about my feelings in a post called "Mister Birdbrain and the Facebook Fallacy." Link below. Hope it helps.

http://dancetodeathafterlife.com/facebook-depresses-me/

OK - first of all, I'm stealing this - there's a song in there somewhere!
More importantly, thanks for sharing. Great advice and SO timely for my personal situation...
Thanks Derek!
Please do! — Derek

Amazing just what I needed to hear today. Thank you.

Well said!! Thumbs up!

Great...I have already stolen this metaphor and logout of my email!

Tilt Your Mirror is a great title. I love this story. But what do you do if they honk their horns?

Your Brilliant! analog to all the successful band i see on Facebook posting all the time.i would like to feel alone sometimes:))

Cool Derek! This low key reminded me of existentialism, something I feel like you underlies a lot of your themes. I dig it and I'm a fan of yours

By the way, do you mind telling me what webite maker do you use? It's so fast and the one of the only owns that do not 1) do not require a VPN here in China, haha.
Thanks! No website maker. I make my own. Here's the code. You're welcome to use it. — Derek

A lot of times I care too much about bothering other people too ... adjusting the mirror seems a little bit selfish, but then again, maybe it isn't ... maybe it's the people who expect you to go faster than you're comfortable who are the selfish ones. They, however, aren't enjoying the drive in either scenario.

Hi Derek, I've been a fan since I joined CD Baby, years ago!What I like most is your ability to connect on a human level, and your common sense solutions! Beside my band, my wife and I own a training and consulting company. To remain motivated to live our dream, we use positive and negative motivators. we ask two simple questions. What will happen if we do, and what will happen if we don't? I have a new book,"SUPER SUCCESSFUL YOU", and a new CD, "LIFE,FROM THE CRADLE TO THE GRAVE", both to be released in 2017! Thanks for your continued inspiration!!!

Peace and Love!!! Lou

Thanks Derek. Good reminder to keep my focus where I want it to be not where others try to direct it. Always appreciate your insights! Glad you can enjoy the drive again.

Ha! I know, I've been doing that for years, tho only w/ my driving.

I have grand thoughts of doing it w/ other areas of life, like, having myself a "writers retreat" here in the apartment. What that means is, I can't afford to take a real, away-somewhere retreat, but I can pretend and block off time and distractions! lol

I love the "smart stuff" wrapped in the stories of daily living.
Loved it!
I'm learning it myself these days.
You got to look at things/situations that move you instead of draining your energy.

Eyes direct the mind. Still gaze - still mind.

In today's world it's so important to stick to YOUR values instead of allowing others to conveniently impose theirs on you making you feel often stressed and miserable. And guilty for causing all the inconvenience being "weird" and inappropriate.

Not so many people learned to live life well. So causing a little inconvenience for the rest of the world very often is beneficial for everyone :)

The question is how long until you are driving comfortably at their speed because you, like them have made the journey too many times...?

Perhaps remembering when we learned and going back to that time is an essential task to appreciate fully where we are.

Thank you so much DS! I love your mind.... thankful you are here

I'm with you brother!
But unfortunately not for your pure reasons. After some negative interchanges with the guy following me I once took the mirror off the windshield, shook it at the car behind me and threw it in the back seat . . . 20 years later I'm some better . . . thanks as always for a great post.

Focus on and take care of what's important no matter what anybody else thinks or says. This is important to get right in life!

Thanks Derek.

Resonates.

Why do you think we refuse to tilt the mirror at times even though we know the results are positive?
Fear of missing out? — Derek

Oh yea,
I'm right there with you, I enjoy driving slow and taking everything as easy as possible but I am a overly sensitive person about other people's feelings and would always pull over or speed up even though I'm doing the speed limit. I haven't tried the mirror trick yet but I'm sure it will work, I realize as I get wiser we are very predictable programmable beings and can be tricked very easily, and by realizing this you can use these tricks for hopefully good positive results. Happy travels.

Nice!
Several weeks ago I declared on FB that I will quit complaining. I got a lot of likes and comments. The first day I discovered that I had to shut up more often.
Easy, until the Packer game. I found that I have complained for weeks about one problem for which I had taken no action. I have noticed that I have more quiet time to reflect and plan, and time to watch the road and the scenery...

Yes! Once again, Derek- you have stumbled across one of the many secrets of life. Its all about perspective. And perspectives can always be changed. More power to ya, brutha!!!

Great post, Derek!

I immediately thought of myself and how stressed I'd feel to be holding up traffic. I absolutely love the tilting the rearview mirror suggestion/metaphor. I need to think less about what others think even if it's just for 30 minutes or so each day. Baby steps...

Thanks for sharing.

By the way, is the picture you included the actual road you've written about.
The photo is from Italy, from this guy. — Derek

Hi Derek,

great metaphor.

I use it on my inbox. View in Outlook called Inbox Zero (shows no mail) and a rule that puts evry email on read. In this way there is no number that tells me that I have work.

J

Thanks again for inspiring me. I just remembered that my dad taught me to do the same thing. I do tilt my mirror, literally. But with the simple brilliance that makes me read every post you write, you turned it into a life lesson that I will happily apply!

Wow...... 1st good to here from you again. 2nd wow again.... what a good time to share this for us all. At this time of a year. Good to get each of us started into the new year no matter what you do. Now for myself, being just my cat, my turtle, and myself who is not getting younger, da. It seems that mirror has gotten very large which I am looking in over my shoulder. It is time to push it up or down but for sure turn it away. Working on my 23rd CD. EACH ONE , I AM BEING TOLD KEEPS GETTING BETTER SO THAT IS GOOD. Also created a single for support of Standing Rock ND. We a good friend and brother just released to the world a 30min. Radio programy with his lead and I am the side kick. Funny and educational at same time. But I feel I am behind and not getting where I want to be and feel like losing time and ground on may not make it to the other side of that mountain. Even starting a Flute Circle up after 1st of the year for sharing.
Turn the mirror away take a breath take in the good sights relax and refocus. Thank you very much Derek. Happy Holidays and blessings

Derek,

Great metaphor !

Like when we tilt our mirror at night to remove the lights behind us, changing our environment and our physiology by changing our posture and thoughts takes practice but is very gratifying and necessary sometimes.

Thank you for sharing this.

Eric

Derek, I truly enjoy your perspective on this. Here are my takeaways: First,small adjustments can make big differences. Second, self awareness provides the road map to meaningful adjustments. Third, if we are not careful we could abandon something great because we lacked creativity. Thanks again Derek. Your sharing and generosity impacted me this morning. Grateful for you!!

Shaun

I loved this!!!! Exact advice exact time! Thank you!

In the end, it's the people in the car and where you're going that matters the most. Don't let the noise and the rear view impact that. Great message.

Your idea works for more than those listed in the metaphors. Difficult projects at work or home.

Fits me perfectly. Excellent timely. Thank you for sharing your talent ☺

Great story !

What if behind there is nobody but me losing it - it being the motivation...
A delicate balance indeed.

Thanx
G.

I happened to come to the same solution, when searching for stress-reduction. But it only works solo, or with kids--with other passengers, you get huffing from the back seat that no mirror can tilt away. Also, you eventually find yourself in an urgent situation (like driving someone to the ER) where leisurely motoring is not an option--then you have to re-learn it all over again afterward.

Now that I am (unwillingly) on the other side of it, where I can't drive at all, I've found the question becomes: Where's the cut-off for cutting-off outside stressors? If you go too far, you start to lose engagement--with your industry, your office, even your family--at some point, you need to accept that stress and connection to others are an indissoluble pair.

Stress is a normal part of a healthy diet--if I could, I would resume that mantle of engagement. The healthy life, the one I miss so much, is a tightrope act--we stress as much as we care, and we are on the lookout for unnecessary stress, because we need that space for the things worth stressing over--the things that have meaning for us.

Group activities generate the most unnecessary stress--when people sit behind the wheel of a car, they lose their minds--I lose my own--it's a strange phenomenon. People waiting on lines manage to get on each others' nerves, too, as if they weren't all there together, doing the same thing.
Someone should research how many people it takes (and how close they have to be, how fast they have to drive, etc.) to engender the start of mob mentality. Perhaps 'mob mentality' is just a phrase meaning stress-resonance-between-three-or-more-people-in-close-proximity.

Yes!

Love it!

Thanks Derek - I always enjoy your posts...

I wonder if there's a mountain bike trail over those mountains?
:)

- Gary
It's New Zealand! Of course there is! ☺ — Derek

My experience on that same beautiful highway was punctuated by seeing a sports car - MGB-like - perched below the winding road in the boughs of a tree and the driver and land-owner having a heated argument. I suppose the driver took his eyes off the road for a second too long.
Your story shows that just the slightest "tweaking" can reap dramatic change. I "tweaked my mirror" this year and tested other genre with a C&W tune, "I Made My Momma Cry", and a Swamp Pop tribute to the victims of the Louisiana flooding, "Yo!, Bro!". Then, I composed "Worship" based on Psalm 95 for Kaye Wright, a Gospel singer in Virginia Beach.
I did get a chance to perform "Yo, Bro!" at a charity fund-raiser with The Band of Brothers (Filipino '60s group) in September. That was great fun!
Derek, I write because I like to write - composing is my place of peace and spiritual union. My motivation is to empower others to find joy and peace in their own lives. Were my motivation money, I would have quit long ago. I tweaked my approach this year to see if I could reach a larger audience and had some success. I will continue to test my self-imposed limits in 2017.
Thanks and Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and Happy and Prosperous New Year!

Go at your own pace and enjoy the experience along the way. Don't let the speed of others make you miss the beauty of the journey you are on.

Needed this, Derek. Thank you.

As always, I love your perspective, Derek. I'd say exactly the same thing with a slightly different twist to make the translation from your metaphor to accomplishing a goal/project. You have to know your "Why". Momentum and motivation are emotionally driven. And so keeping your eyes on why you want that thing, what's the payoff, what you'll get out of it, how it will change your life and the life of others who are important to you, will enable you to keep your focus off the stress, off the considerations, obstacles and fears that your goal/project causes. Keep your eye on the prize and why that prize is really important to you and to those you care about and the motivation and momentum will take care of itself.
Love,
Coach Debra

How beautiful it is to drive slowly through a beautiful place with an interesting podcast/audiobook playing.

I feel a lot like you, great idea!!

Derek, your work and your words have resonated deeply with me since I heard you on the Tim Ferriss podcast. Although my reach is not as wide as yours I too use my personal blog to share a very similar message.

http://www.rajdaniels.com/distractions/

Thank you for the additional reminders.

Intentionally,

Raj

Awesome comparison. But many a times even after tilting the mirror we still look through the mirror and stress ourselves. More than inconvenience to others, it is a question of overcoming our own addiction to all these distractions that drain our motivation.

Limiting distractions and staying focused is a master key to going where you want to go!

Lol, now when I get stuck behind a slow moving vehicle, I will picture someone with this in mind. Rather than getting upset, I will take time to reflect before the next passing lane.

Love it Derek. I recently unfriended about 100 "friends" on Facebook that I realized I am in no way on the same page with and was tired of having their offensive comments in my face everyday. Instantly my friend base went down dramatically but now I notice a completely different interaction with this new age method of communicating. We need to learn to be proactive in achieving what we want in life....for me peace and joy!!

Much resonance with this adjustment. Gracias! Many applications, since, as Sheryl Crow suggests, "Every day is a winding road."
She adds,
"...Jump in, let's go
Lay back, enjoy the show"

Great advice. Thanks for sharing, excellent way to start my week!

Love, love, LOVE!! I literally do this all the time while driving!! I like to "be" in the moments a lot while driving. But! Thank you so much for taking it a step further with the metaphor! I never thought to apply to those areas...SO GOOD!!! Thank you so much Derek, I love your insights! Always something new to learn, or a new way of perceiving the world. Hugs to you!!

Thanks again for a great insight. As a fellow impatient driver, I feel their pain sitting behind you ;) And whether we like it or not, that super slow car in front of us can be a reminder to us rushers that we really should slow down sometimes. Have a wonderful day!

This is good. I don't have much time in my week to write songs. When I do have time I feel the pressure of the clock, the pile of laundry staring at me, the fact that I can't force inspiration. So just to remember to tilt the mirror for a few minutes and just relax in the creative moment. Whether or not something gets "finished" is not the goal but that I took the time to drive to the mountain. Thank you.

Great post. In life, you need to either change your perception of things, or your proceedures toward them. If your personal "rules" dictate the way your life is going to be, and you always get a negative result, you need to either need to "avoid" the situation that lead to this result, or change your rules.

As my friend TR always says, “The quality of our lives is directly related to the amount of uncertainty we can live with comfortably.”

...next time go even slower and take a video so we can also see the beauty ;)

Yes! The other drivers' emotional weight is theirs alone to carry. It has taken me 30 years to figure that lil secret out, but it is such a game changer. Thank you, Derek, for sharing such a tangible example.

GREAT advice! I'm going to share this. Many of us are struggling right now with how to live our truth but not harm our relationships. Many of us worry too much about what others are thinking or how they might react. We must get over that if we are going to move on.

Liked the the post Derek.

Sometimes our rear view mirror is so big it makes it hard to see in front of us ☺

Your articles are the highlight of my inbox! I can completely relate to the point of tilting the perspective to free yourself from what other people think. Once you do this - pure bliss. And no one views us under the same microscopic lens from which we view ourselves.

Warm wishes,
Lori

Hi Derek
Thanks for the short blog.
Are you in New Zealand?
Pretty road.
Yes, I like the suggestion which is simple enough to do quickly.

Have you ever written something on how the inner landscape totally changes forever, when one's parents especially the mother dies? No rudder.It is a very personal and unique journey for everyone I think, but the shift in one's world is different say than a loss of a lover, a mate which can be disorienting. Just like to hear a thinker's view of this. It is kind of like this blog which is what made me think of it.

Love the beauty your your photo. Thanks again for your thoughts.

Antonia

Is this maybe only a step in the direction of achieving what you're really looking for? Maybe try tilting the mirror back and see if you're able to overcome the empathetic anxiety by looking the problem directly. Then make the conscious decision to look at it how you want and not respond emotionally. A filter works best when the substance you're trying to filter is flowing through it, not around it;)

Keeping your eye on the ball is a must when you're involved in sports, but in other aspects of life it is acceptable to look around and at the scenery once in a while, but not to the point of missing the point you are aiming for in life.

Great metaphor! It's so much easier to plan the future if the chaos behind you isn't on your mind. Thank you! This will now be easier to remember as I adjust my mirror every day.

Thanks Derek! A perfect read for my Monday morning to get my motivation going!!
best wishes

Thought you'd moved to Florida. No mountains. Oh. Metaphor. Thanks.
There's another Derek Sivers in Florida. (Really. And he's a musician, too.) He is not me. — Derek

Now this is brilliant...succinct and true. Thank you for posting this. The pic is priceless.

This is a lovely idea. I've adapted some similar strategies. Thank you.

Man, I thought I was the only one who gets anxious over holding up the cars behind me. Feels like such an unreasonable and strange thing...

I've done this before! Love it.

👏😄 This one really got me for some reason — bravo!

Thanks for this. Needed it today. Lately I've taken to tilting the mirror down, to see my kid in the backseat, instead of the crazy drivers behind me. Way more relaxing.

I often need to get rid of the clutter. That seems to eat away like the cars behind but it takes a different method as some of the obstacles end up in front of you. This makes it necessary to do a snow plow routine every so often to keep open paths to the things in your life that you travel between.

I needed this; particularly relative to the metaphor of discouraging family.
Every time it pops up I ask "how do I deal with this in a gentle but firm manner?"
I'll be looking more acutely for ways to tilt my rear view mirror!
Thanks Derek!

There is a really fine line between inconvenient & inconsiderate.
If I were behind you with a sick child in the car trying to get to a doctor I'd be more than a little upset.
Recently, a particular artist decided he didn't want to do the gig & cancelled the rest of his tour.
Some say he has mental issues. I think he's just an a-hole.
He has people paid to make up excuses for him, make it spin positive. "needs rest", "just had a traumatic experience" & more. But his history says otherwise. He's been a spoiled brat from the get-go.
A classic unfiltered narcissist who's all about "fk the world, I am so awesome I can do whatever I want!"
I know that is not the intention of your blog here, & I know you are not like that.
But ignoring pressures & issues is outright dangerous. That's almost like "Nah, I'll just check those parachute straps later" At the point where you had a lot of people to answer to as CEO, moving on was an easier way to go in a lot of ways. Starting up other companies meant building another pressure cooker, so you adjusted your strategy. Even writing books & articles has a time frame.
Tilting the mirror is not a good thing. This is the first time I really think you missed the mark, because though it will generate dialog, & maybe help some people get over, There are plenty who will consider this an "okay" to get all pollyanna & ignore reality instead of finding a better way to take off some of the pressure, for example, as you mentioned way early on, delegating the muck work so you can focus on the good stuff.
I'm sure there are others who will make similar comments here & I wish I had time to read through, but I have priorities & other people waiting on me…
:)

Good move! We lived in the charming mountain community of Idyllwild, CA
For a few years and still cherish the friends we have.
Curvy roads with cliffs and few barriers made driving terrifying especially with black ice. Also there are Infrequent tiny areas to pull over to allow others to pass. In 1995 I made a poster and hung it at the post office where locals could add ideas to the Random Acts of kindness list. Allowing cars to pass was #1 on the list.
Our son in law picked us up at the train station in Rome, Italy and chauffeured us around for a weekend and dropped us at our cruise ship. His driving skills were nothing short of the Canam.
Upon mentioning our admiration, he told us that Italians look forward when driving. They don't look back or sideways, just forward. This seemed contrary to my drivers training instructions, but
It works. Paris was another driving experience. That was more like a party. I would say in life it is good to look forward and look back when safely stopped.

Are you tilting the mirror up on the blog post comments? :) Good stuff, Derek. Simple yet effective. I tilted the mirror up regarding "news" recently and it's been liberating. Thanks for sharing.
Not yet. — Derek

Nice one Derek! Using your metaphor, my mirror needs to get adjusted when it comes to my recordings. Always worried about those "new" gadgets that will finally make my music perfect. Distracted by others ability to play something better or faster then myself. Time to adjust that mirror, slow down and realize that just being able to create my music is amazing.

Excellent perspective!

Hey Derek,

I enjoy your work. Please continue creating, I'm sure I am not the only one you are helping.

Thanks,
Jordan

TOTALLY needed to see this at this moment in time. Funny how the simplest adjustment can make all the difference in our world. Hugs to you, W & S 💜

Derek,

I've heard a similar metaphor about changing the angle of my view, so I'm not disturbed by the surrounding environment. This helps to maintain focus and peace of mind.

Best regards,
Marshal

I did something like this a week or two ago for Facebook. I deleted it from my phone: no app, no saved login info or bookmark on the phone's browser. I'm only allowed to log on via my laptop, which I'm only on for productive work. I've checked Facebook a few times over the past week, which is much better than the reflexive checking a few times every hour. It also caused me to seek out news from outlets I trust instead of relying on friends' posts.
Smart! I do the same. — Derek

We are too easily concerned with how others see us and allow ourselves to be intimidated.

Thank you so much for this. Great for a smile, the truth, and motivation:) Wish there were social media share buttons on this page! Thanks again!
The URL is the universal share button: sive.rs/tilt There. Now you can share it on over a billion different sites. ☺ — Derek

Hi Derek you hit the spot when you said this applied to me I can only apply this to the road of life that I've been on for sometime and I feel like I've been doing exactly what you talked about for many years now iTake life at your own speed and you don't need to worry about who wants to pass

This is great! With the new year approaching, it will be very useful to tilt the mirror down and away from distractions. Thanks Derek!

Great concept. I completely agree with it.
However, I find the example of the twisted road a bit misleading - you are stressing out others by driving too slow.
I challenge you to come up with a better example, Derek!

So simple, pleasant and immediate to understand, Thanks!

Have you been reading my journals? This is PRECISELY what I do. I've even tried to recommend it, only to see it as someone preaching a religion, and no one wants to hear it. (I was preaching the PEACE that would ensue!)
High Twenty, not five for you, my friend!
Rhonda

My message was ALL about the tweak, I hope that came through....I was driving so fast I forgot to make sure. (just kidding on the literal front).

Fantastic and memorable. Keep it up.
-bart

Hi Derek,

Thanks for your perspective. It's funny that I should find this post now (in my junk mail of all places). Just a few hours ago I installed News Feed Eradicator for Chrome, and now Facebook is so much less stressful! Suddenly not the effective time thief anymore ☺

I used to do this all the time with my rear view mirror so I would not be stressed or pressured by tail-gaiters!! Works like a charm!

I actually discovered something similar a few weeks ago. When trying to get work done, my iPhone would be next to my computer, and any notification on it would pop up and distract me.

So when I want to get work done, I've started turning my iPhone face down, and made sure the ringer is off. It is a small change, but increased my productivity drastically.

I love this! Pay attention to what you're paying attention to! Great work. HFH

Thanks Derek. This came at a good time for me. You are a person that helps others. You should be proud.

Interesting terrain, with spontaneous creative solutions & the empty tilted mirror gives the otherwise beautiful photo an other-worldly sense of a road less travelled!!!

janice

Great, advice....You really have your finger on the pulse of so many thing....sometimes I think your talking to me. I really appreciate your thoughts.

Thanks Derek! A similar example: at lecture in a college class, sit in the front of the room so you don't notice that half the people are distracted
Great example! Thank you. — Derek

Love it. Simple and wonderful. Too often we overlook the small stuff when the small stuff is usually the best way to find some relief. Thanks for this!

Thanks for this ... guess all of us are needing to reassess ... I've pretty much isolated myself from "the world" ... maybe not the best solution, but helps. My main stumbling block is my own mind ... staying off FB would help too.

Great metaphor. Thanks Derek :)

I felt like that everytime i left the house. It seems everyone was in hurry and doing everything to get on my nerves. I decided life is to short to worry about the assholes behind me. Cause after all they were behind me and I was in control.

Fabulous, really picked up what you were putting down Derek! Going to share something with you, my Dad calls vomit a "Technicolour Yawn" thought that was worth mentioning for some reason ha ha!

Good move! Good parable. I felt the frustration. I felt the relief! I will remember it. It goes in my bag of coping tools!
Thank you.

Hi Derek,

An interesting article: have you considered the possibility of developing "inner slowness"? I notice myself having and enjoying this experience more and more these days.

Warm regards,

Lucas

It is indeed true. We often care too much on what others might think about things we do or we try too hard to please others and become everybody's darling so to speak. However, this attitude drains us emotionally and in reality we do not get any joy at all of what we do. Thanks for the tips.

One simple tweak can do wonders. Thank you Derek.

dooooope

Beautifully written!I miss reading your posts regularly.Please write often.Thanks :)

Derek,

Thanks for dropping in to my Inbox today.

I needed to hear this…badly! I have been so stressed out lately with discouraging family members that if this winding, mountain road you speak of were anywhere near my house, I would literally drive my car off the side of it.

I have been desperately trying for years now to bring my once close-knit family back together again. There’s been so much disconnection among family members that I just about gave up trying.

But before calling it quits altogether, I, too, made one last tweak.

Thanksgiving weekend I decided to set up a family forum at my house and invited everyone to come and discuss the issues affecting our family and to find solutions. I provided the food and drinks and even put together a PowerPoint presentation.

Yeah, I went all out!

For nearly four hours we had the most open and honest discussion we’ve had in a while. And for the first time in a long time I came away feeling optimistic and inspired. For some reason, just the simple act of extending an olive branch made all the difference.

Now my motivation is present again. I can feel it and I can see it in them, too.

I just hope it continues.

Thanks Derek!

Oh, is that ever applicable! Now, to just figure out which mirror to tilt and and how to keep it tilted (always the eternal challenge.) But, thank you so much for the reminder and the insight!

(i don't have time to write up how cool i think this is right now [very, proper response later] but want to make sure you keep filling me in when you post stuff).

The delights of the Rimutakas...

Hope you made it as far as Martinborough?

Regards
Nigel

Great! article
I lived in Idyllwild,know "exactly" what your describing and I resemble that completely, with he exception of a child throwing up in the back seat.

Great timing also! Just when I need a small push and some motivation. I have set up my art studio completely and only lack motivation and a project that inspires me. Both our needs may be met here!
Have a great and blessed day Derek.

Dude; you rock. Time to not only twist some mirrors, but spend more time looking forward through the windshield of my life, then backwards through the small mirrored life behind me.

Such a great thought to start the day. I am surrounded by monsters of government, lack of funding that tries to throw me under the bus so I will become one with government, and those naysayers...oh the naysayers. Yet I love community and learning how people want to set their own goals without bowing down to outcome control. So much to fight for that is right. I am motivated. Thanks for the tilt!

I'm sorry but as a Kiwi who is lucky to be alive after experiencing a road accident, I don't agree with this!

How simply pulling over (or slowing to a near standstill and using your indicator to overtake like truckers do) a few times and let everyone go past - that would reduce the chances of someone doing something stupid to overtake you or someone in the queue. Other cars overtaking in dangerous places is one of the leading causes of deaths on NZ road. So instead of blocking out the stress others are feeling, even if they are just being impatient, you could start a movement where people show courtesy to each other as they drive over that hill.

If you really want to appreciate the view, try a tandem paraglide into the valley from the top!

Michael ☺

Derek,

The story and metaphor is an amazing way to shape our daily lives. I too live by the same belief to put on horse blinders when the static noise gets to be overwhelming. This is the best way to keep your focus, especially when you have a dream and goal in mind. #CarpeDiem

Without tilting the mirror, it's almost like we let other ppl drive the car. There's not enough room in our head for the stress. Good thoughts. Taking to the extreme, this idea can make us self-centered buttholes--but if we are typically considerate ppl that get stressed out about inconveniencing ppl, great advice. Thanks.

Great thoughts and advice as usual. But, I have to say on behalf of all motorcyclists who love curvy roads, DAMN YOU! 😝

Point well taken. I'll apply it. Thanks!

Love this metaphor. Esp this line: When you notice something is affecting your drive, find a way to adjust your environment.

I always tell people if I relied on my motivation I'd spend all my time sitting on the couch watching netflix and eating Ben&Jerry :D

Thank you.

Your words of wisdom always come at the right time. :)

Good point Derek. Yes, Looking back has never does anyone any good. Slow and steady and moving forward. Seize the Day

Thanks for sharing. I wish I would have read this before wrote my latest post on motivation.
http://take20today.com/always-search-motivation-get-healthy-healthy-live-healthy/
Being a novice writer, I appreciated your metaphor.

Love this! Really illustrates how some small shifts can make a big difference. Thanks for sharing!
Bob

Thanks for the perspective Derek. Brilliant as always.

Dude. You're incredible. Do you send out your blog updates via email? I want to sign up if so. Thanks kindly!

SassySarahYoga.com

I have literally been in that situation several times. I'll try to drive slower in the future. Great advice.

Hi Derek,

Thanks for sharing your latest insight- I always enjoy reading your articles. Is this windy road in NZ? I remember your mentioning in an article you were living in NZ. I'm in Queenstown now, traveling around the South Island. It's such a beautiful country where the roads indeed wind through spectacular scenery. We met many years ago when the Durango Songwriters Conference was at Tamarron in Dgo.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi and wish you a happy holiday season.

Cheers,

Elle

Love the metaphor, Derek. I've learned to do it with my family, but my Inbox often gets the better of me. This is a great reminder that my Inbox only "wins" because I keep looking at it!
Yes! Love the simplicity of that so much I'm quoting you in bold, so more people see it. “My inbox only ‘wins’ because I keep looking at it.” - Jim Smith. ☺ — Derek

Good advice, Derek.

First Rule of Italian driving!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjGXn249Fc0

That was Great

Subtle shifts of intent and breath sometimes bring a depth of awareness- mind:heart integration that clarifies ones journey

practical, usable advice .... the real step we need to take for course correction and not change the course itself.

That's true Derek. We all have days like this once a while and such shift is needed no matter what others think or say. Thanks and we are wishing you and your family a merry and glorious christmas season.

www.ammgospel.com

You're right Derek. When life starts going faster than we want to go, we need to slow down. What's that saying "Stop and smell the roses along the way"? And as a Christian, there's a verse in the Bible that speaks volumes to me, it's Psalm 46 vs 10, "Be still and Know that I am God". If I focus on that verse, it really helps to keep me calm in a given situation.
Thanks for your message.
Michael J Ramplin

Thank you for sharing! It's reminded me about the Cockroach Theory by Sundar Pichai. We should positively "respond" instead of "react" to incidents in life.
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/cockroach-theory-beautiful-speech-sundar-pichai-brahmbhatt-cswe-

Good one! Thanks for this link. — Derek

Just what I needed to read today, thanks ❤️

Absolute sense ☺ and I fully resonate!!

Love it! As a driving strategy, though, it wouldn't work that well here in Minnesota...you need to know who's surrounding you on all sides anytime you're on the road.

Very timely. Thank you for sharing, Derek...I needed this!

living by the principle that as long as you are not hurting people physically, and you're not hurt by people physically, do what you want to do.. and let them be what they are and let them do what they want..

drive slowly.. smell the flowers.. look at the beauty of nature.. miracle right in front of our eyes only if we can look closely..

thanks derek!

take it easy..

sirjj

Very insightful post, Derek! Great reminder how simple changes of environment can make a huge impact in our happiness.

I'm curious though. Do you think that there are ways for us to boost our motivation in an activity by adding things to the experience? Or do you think that the key to boosting motivation lies in the elimination of negative factors? I noticed that your advice on this topic revolves around relaxing more and removing stimuli/input. Would be interesting to see your thoughts about the opposite strategy!
Either one. I remember long ago Tony Robbins saying that if he had to make a lot of phone calls, he would do it from his jacuzzi, to make it more enjoyable. — Derek

Once I figured you were back in NZ, I knew it was the Rimutakas. I drive it at least once a month with my mum who has aphasia. Even though she can't really speak, it's on no uncertain terms that she lets me know if I'm going too quick. I love this idea, it's a beautiful drive. (Says the person who works for a car yard, so every drive is like a test drive).

And to the others wondering- those that drive it everyday are really aggressive on the hill. As Derek says there is stacks of passing lanes. The descent is madness though coming into the Wairarapa. Scary stuff.

My mirror will be tilted:)

Love it! Thanks for sharing this inspiring viewpoint Derek

Derek

This must be the name of your next book - surely???

Love it.

Avrilx

I'm a 60 year old student pilot and lifetime student of music and piano.

The rearview mirror might also be a metaphor for the past i.e. the story of our life that has been created by past failures, past slights, past hurts, past judgments etc etc. The negative narrative that stops us, distracts us, slows us down from doing what our Heart desires Now.

I regularly flip that rearview mirror up when negative memories and voices from the past start honking their horns at me. And believe me, at 60 years old, that's a long line of cars lol ☺

Well, Derek, I know where you're at when it comes to driving those winding roads for the first time. I went through the same thing when I first moved up to Prescott and took the road going down to Phoenix to visit my family. I found it to be a little stressful with the winding road that seemed to take you to the middle of know where (Maybe not as stressful as you were because I didn't have kids throwing up in my back seat) but all the same, I wasn't relaxed enough to see the beauty of the mountains around me. But after driving it several times, it was like second nature because I knew where all of those turns were going to be.
Now, I don't know if this metaphor has anything to do with my motivation, other than getting to Phoenix in one piece, but I CAN tell you that driving that 100 mile rat maze has seemed shorter and more relaxed.

Hey Derek! Great Great Man!! Focus and I think so true life's rythmn, not everyone else's! To enjoy the journey is, I feel to be excellent! Beautiful photo too!! So great to hear from ye, me friend! Have a Happy Holiday Derek!! Love and music! Rachel!☺

Dig it. Sometimes the small adjustment is in the attitude.

As I caught myself tailgating someone this evening, I thought back to this post and wondered how many relationships I have where I'm the one stressing someone else out. Will try to be more conscious of both sides of the reflection in the mirror (or something like that, not sure I matched the metaphor).

You're being inconsiderate and selfish.

Love this, Derek! Stay in your own lane and respect your own pace is what I have to remind myself often! Thank you for this. :)

I like this Article! So true... I just spent a week in negotiations
I should have tweeked allot more.. I'd like to hear your thoughts on people with more power and money and how to let them know that my time is important also!
I find people like this irritating. BTW negotiations were with a fellow who has plenty of clout at a major label...I just hate how smug they treat the unsigned artist.I did what they asked and worked in the studio for a week around the clock making changes to one of my recordings that they like....Did I ask for anything from them? No just wanted them to acknowledge me as a writer.
So as I sat stewing at the arrogance as they pumped me up and offered me all the gold in the world I went to work on putting a fuck into the basterd!

Brilliant, helped me to look at a work situation differently.

I felt it was me "looking the rear view mirror".
Good tip. I must tilt my mirror from now on.
Thanks Derek

As always, Derek: this article is potent, to-the-point, and offers useful morsels of knowledge-wisdom-life-lessons.

Brilliant! Your life , your priorities, your pace! Love it.

Derek, thanks for all! This was a great article to read; very interesting too how Answers from the Cosmos today (http://tinyurl.com/h6rv7no) was about our rear view mirror!
May I ask a favor? I know that you are extremely busy but if you can manage to carve out a few minutes, I would be greatly honored. I’m looking to help self-help authors increase traffic to their blogs so more people can experience the power of their message; plus I’m also looking for examples and stories by non-authors too on how positive techniques have helped: http://tinyurl.com/j922xrc Thanks. Ter Scott!

The metaphor is perfect for every journey, except maybe the return journey. Even when you are just going through the motions (seeing the same stuff agin and just wanting to get the Kids home and into bed. It maybe an idea to just tilt the mirror back. Perhaps to remind yourself, that there may be unplesantness even when you are doing mundane tasks and not just when persuing a great day out.

As usual, right on point and right on time.
Adjusting how I work each week is actually opening me up to spend more time on the things I really care about (my core stuff is finally getting some overdue attention).

Thanks for the reminder and happy driving!
Nat

I love the simplicity of this solution. I also love the way in which you addressed your stress iteratively by implementing small tweaks.

Thanks for this message Derek! Watching my four year old live unfettered from public opinion is truly a joy; something I strive to emulate. What a great tool for living.

Thank you Derek for sharing your thoughts & words with us all!

Good one Derek, thanks. I shared it with my email list.

Awesome and very true. Thanks

Derek, I love it. So well put. Social media including regular TV, print, and radio....are all banned or radically limited. I'm so much happier and focused when I don't go on Facebook, watch TV, or listen to the radio. Starting to feel like a social outcast...but I'm so much happier. It's all too much. They seem to be what you do when you're avoiding your true, what you came here to do, work. I've also found that when I'm procrastinating, it means I'm not truly ready to do what I need to do. So I just give in to it. But do something life giving, not life wasting, in the meantime.

Hi Derek, it's been years since you left CD BABY what a great success it was, thanks for that! I'v been driving with all my mirrors tilted away so I did not have to see the autos behind me, tilted just right that if I moved my head they came into view just to keep my bearing...made driving less stressful.

Wow this really did apply to me thanks for sharing
I will be tilting my mirror keep sharing

Great post Derek! I should read the conclusion of this article twice a day to help me get focused.

Motivation is delicate. And funny how I always turn into someone else once I'm behind the wheel because I react to every little thing on the road. I turn crazy because I can't make the distinction between stimuli that I should react to and ones that I need to let go. Driving, like life, like business. Motivation is delicate. Thanks.

Resonating!
In this new year, I will tilt my mirror. Instead of looking back at mistakes, discouragements, negative judgement, know what's best for myself (keep sensing and making sense of critiques), follow my heart and just Do It!

Your last email on "Quitting What You Love", inspired me to go
back and read this one. My, I need to hear this and really let it
sink in to motivate me to make the changes my gut is telling me to.
I love singing, songwriting and playing out but "real work" keeps
me so busy that there's hardly time. So, you've shared this great combination
to help me focus. Thanks! Blessings to you.

Amazing! This is so vivid, it would make a great song.

Catching up with the series...

Excellent metaphor for so many things applicable to life, my life,

Duly noted and I am sure it will come to mind as I turn many corners.

Living north of Anchorage Alaska, I totally understand this. Driving on a small mountain road when it's snowy. Fit's your message perfectly.

This gave me a much better outlook on the way I do things. Really made me think abOut the way I'm doing What I want to do. Thank you.

I really needed this today.

Thank you!!!

Well, except for the making-everybody-behind-you angry part, good advice! Thanks for sharing.

Thank you for this it's awesome!

Derek, that's a great story. . . hahaha. It works. I have grandma's honking at me. My own father refuses to ride with me driving. But slowing things down to enjoy the trip really does works. "It's NOT the destination, it's the journey." ~Many People Say

That's how I feel most of the time I'm driving too - worried about being too slow for other drivers. Good lesson! The other advice I try to tell myself when motivation declines is "count of discipline, not motivation" something I heard on the Tim Ferriss podcast. Anyway, thanks Derek!

Love it! I too, used care a great deal about any driver that got around my car to pass me (read: other people), as to me it meant I was too slow (read: imperfect) for other people's standards. But then I decided, the heck! If someone wants to drive at break-neck speed it's on them! My and my kid's safety is first. SO, I did what you did, I flipped the mirror up, so I didn't have to watch people sitting on my tail and I decided to wish well to all that passed me. Relief. And with time, I stopped caring about all that so much, so now, I don't even have to flip the mirror. Cheers!

Thanks, Derek. I'll have to try that metaphor against my current gumption trap.

Great read. Simple Truths. Duly Noted. Applying now. ☺

Great advice - it has taken me a long time to get back to pleasurable email reading because I've been driving with my mirror up for the last 2 years.
Thanks for the story - great reminder!

As a testament to your theory, driving with my mirror up has allowed me to realize my true dreams and experience happiness. I'm now doing what I want and making money off of it and through working through my bullshit, experiencing a balanced, happy life. :)

Derek,

Just wanted to let you know I have a recurring task every couple months to come back and read this story. I then take a few minutes thinking through the stressors in my life and look for subtle things that might change the situation.

Often I find I'm stressing about things that don't matter (if there are passing lanes, people can be frustrated for a minute, it's ok...) or I find I don't even need to do the thing that is stressing me out.

Thank you for sharing.
Thanks Chris! — Derek

Strange. Folks who criticize Derek for going slower seem to be the same ones who didn't read his part about passing lanes. I wonder if they are the same ones who don't look for metaphors. So: Does poor reading comprehension go with literal mindedness? I wonder.

We have passing lanes in the Rocky Mountains too, with advance notice signs so you can get close to the car ahead before the lane appears.

I needed a hack for relatives who distracted me by disparaging me, my accomplishments, and anyone who documented I was OK, such as my bosses and associates. My hack was to add, after I relayed any compliments or awards, the phrase, "And I know you believe me." It worked quite well.

Great story

This analogy hit me so damn hard.

Thanks again Derek! So glad I come back to this regularly. It’s been super stressful at work and I’m feeling anxious all the time. This reminded me again that life doesn’t have to be this way. I just need to figure out what is the root cause and start there, then be ok with making changes that make me calmer.

Loved it....#tilting the mirror