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Some Wordlers choose their starter word based purely on its aesthetic qualities. Others prefer to slaughter as many vowels as possible with hate in their hearts and the ruthless efficiency of a machine. And some Wordlers flit from word to word like whimsical little sprites with no damn sense of what’s right and proper. But every Wordler has to start somewhere, and when they do, they reveal a part of their soul. This is what your Wordle starter word says about you.

You are an intellectual. You have taste and refinement. You can speak eloquently on any number of the important topics of the day. But the sheer intensity of your naked greed will be your undoing.

Your kindness and your tender nature speak well of you, but they will hold you back when it comes to the bleak, joyless slog that characterizes life in the Wordle trenches.

You are calculating, efficient, and have plenty of time to practice your Wordling because no one ever invites you to parties.

You have absolutely no sense of decorum.

You have a decidedly Pre-Raphaelite sensibility. If you lived in the 1800s, Christina Rossetti would write a poem about you and John Everett Millais would paint you floating down a river looking beautiful but also dead. None of this helps with your Wordle solving average.

You don’t much like Wordle, but you don’t much like yourself either, so you’re trying to see if two wrongs make a right.

You don’t really get Wordle?

You’re a very engaging conversationalist, but people find your cold, lifeless eyes kind of upsetting.

You used to start with “Stare,” but someone told you that meant you were no fun at parties.

You think this is a game, don’t you? A droll little adventure to start your day. No, this is Wordle, and no matter where it begins, it will end, inevitably, in Death. Or “Toast.” You never really know!

You would be a perfect companion on a road trip apart from the smell!

Your favorite show is The Good Place.

Your favorite show is Ezra Klein’s podcast for The New York Times.

Your favorite show is Paw Patrol.

In a past life, you were a Druid, standing proudly before the Great Stones and summoning the power of the very Sun, which is why you never get quite as much satisfaction as you expect from solving the Wordle in just three tries.

This is an ugly, Brutalist word that speaks of a distorted, bitter spirit. Sure, it gets the job done, but at what cost to your soul?

You absolutely need to go outside more.

I’ve learned the hard way that you really shouldn’t call someone a “filthy little piggy” no matter how much it’s warranted, so I’m just going to avoid commenting on this one.

Some people just want to watch the Wordle burn.