Myth 1: Leaders have to be the best at the craft.

This applies more to managers than individual contributor (IC) leaders. At this point, our job has changed: it is to deliver results through others, rather than getting the work done by ourselves. We will have talented designers who can craft work-class designs much better than us. Just like athletic coaches, we need to have expert knowledge and be competent enough to guide others to do the job, but we can not perform better than the athletes if we are on the sports field.

As a leader, we are here to engage, support, develop, inspire, and elevate our team to amplify their great work. Our expected deliverables are a happy and high-performing team, a well-oiled engine that works efficiently and produces less waste, and a great product or service that customers love.

Instead of focusing on hands-on work, leaders devote themselves more to creating the environment and conditions that bring the best out of everyone to accomplish something bigger and greater. This includes hiring stunning and complementary team members, crafting a compelling vision to keep the team engaged and inspired, establishing clearly defined mechanisms to make things happen, and cultivating a psychologically safe and inclusive culture so everyone can perform at their best and work well with each other.

Myth 2: Leaders have all the answers.

People expect leaders to always show up as confident, assertive, and know-how. However, in the rapidly and constantly changing world, we are tackling bigger and more complex problems we have never solved before, our previous playbook can no longer guarantee success in the future. We simply don’t and can’t have all the answers. It’s inevitable that leaders also feel lost at times, make mistakes, and will need to course-correct the direction.

Great leaders know innovation is a team sport, they are aware of their limitations, so they listen more than they speak, they actively solicit other’s feedback, they admit their mistakes when things happen, they accept the leadership of others, and empower others to be leaders. These are not a sign of weakness. Rather, humility comes from a sense of self-confidence and appreciation of others.

It’s much easier said than done. The fear of not knowing enough and the feeling of inadequacy are real. But let’s remind ourselves that making mistakes and asking for help are integral parts of learning and growth, they don’t mean we failed as a leader. As leaders, we get better results by leveraging others. We don’t have to have all the answers, we don’t have to know every piece of information, and we don’t have to figure out things alone.

Myth 3: Being in charge means we have control.

Being a leader means we have more responsibilities, but it doesn’t necessarily mean we have more control or things will get easier. Instead, it can be quite the opposite in my experience for a few reasons.

First of all, the problems we are tackling now are bigger and harder. They probably can’t be solved by ourselves or within our team or function. This means we have dependencies on others and vice versa. We have to constantly build relationships, seek allies, create alignment, and influence others including our leaders to achieve a common goal.

Secondly, even though we have a team or direct reports, we can’t force people to do something if they don’t buy into it. If we use your power and position to dictate, we are doomed to get mediocre results at best and lose our team sooner or later.

Furthermore, instead of pushing pixels ourselves, our job is overseeing and supporting others who now own that task. This means we are further removed from the hands-on job, we are indirectly impacting the work and its quality, we shouldn’t demand every decision go through us and everything to be done exactly our way. People want autonomy and we don’t want to be a micro-managing leader.

Leadership is not about being “​in charge,” it’s about taking care of those “in your charge”. — Simon Sinek

Great leaders I know influence other by articulating the why of the work to motivate talents to join forces, crafting a shared vision to establish alignment, driving excellence by leveraging the team’s collective intelligence and building on each other’s ideas, and providing empathetic, candid, and constructive feedback frequently to coach others and build trust.

Myth 4: Extroversion is the only way to lead.

We live in a world where the extrovert ideal is very much desired. Extroverted behaviors are the gold standards and introversion is often seen as a flaw. We expect a leader to be extroverted, outspoken, charismatic, social, assertive… Therefore, as introverts, we often put on a mask and pretend to be extroverts. However, portraying a false self is very exhausting and ineffective.

The good news is that introverts can make great leaders when they leverage their superpowers. For example, Introverts are naturally good at active listening, we listen attentively and empathetically, process information thoroughly, and then deliver thoughtful responses. This makes our team feel heard and valued, and ensures we understand what they have to say before jumping into conclusions or advice.

Besides, introverts don’t feel the need to grab the center of attention and often give credit where credit is due. They inspire and encourage others to shine. We are acceptive of new ideas. Wharton School professor Adam Grant conducted research that shows:

“In a dynamic, unpredictable environment, introverts are often more effective leaders — particularly when workers are proactive, offering ideas for improving the business. Such behavior can make extroverted leaders feel threatened. In contrast, introverted leaders tend to listen more carefully and show greater receptivity to suggestions…”

Most people do not listen with the intent to understand. Most people listen with the intent to reply. — Stephen Covey

Myth 5: Leadership is given.

Many people think they can’t be a leader until they are told so. It’s natural to think “Oh, but I’m not a manager” or “That’s not my decision to make”. But anyone can exhibit leadership. If you are speaking up when things go wrong, if you are insisting on high standards when things are slipping, if you are going beyond the call of duty to help a colleague, you are leading.

Don’t wait for permission or invitation to lead. Instead, we should conduct ourselves as a leader first. By doing great work, by deeply caring about people, by providing support, and by removing roadblocks for the team, we earn the trust of others that people want to follow us.

We don’t need a title to lead. We just need to care. People would rather follow a leader with a heart than a leader with a title.— Craig Groeschel

Myth 6: Leadership is a destination.

Leadership is not the mountain top we have to reach, but the journal of climbing the mountain. It’s not about leaving others behind and climbing the mountain alone to reach a spot where everyone else is looking up to you, but bringing the entire team along to a new height to see the breathtaking vista they have never experienced before.

Being in a leadership position doesn’t mean we can rest and let others do all the hard work. Instead, it’s a place we dare not to linger. Just like when reaching the mountaintop, we will realize there are countless more mountains to climb. We may discover bigger challenges to conquer. We may see the Promised Land and know the journey is not ended. Of course, we should stop, appreciate, celebrate, and reflect, but it is not a place we can rest forever in perfect peace.