Tucker Carlson by Gage Skidmore via Wikimedia Commons.

Having been one of the only Black students in a rural Southern high school and an extremely conservative law school, I have never met a racist…according to the people who said and did racist things in front of me. Racism without racists is what has resulted in a world in which many white people view being called out for racism as being worse than racism itself. To this end, and to avoid ever having to change, many white people have decided that only they can be trusted to decide what racism is.

When it comes to the people who feel they can substitute their opinions about racism for the lived experience of those of us who have been dealing with it our entire lives, there are basically just two types.

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The more odious of these two types of “non-racists” are racist trolls who seem to revel in gaslighting minorities with their denials. Just go on social media and take a gander at the comment section of any story about racial injustices or police killings. You’ll find no shortage of people spewing hate along the lines of “That Thug deserved it,” even when talking about a child, or “Black Lives don’t matter because all lives matter.” Basically saying things just short of using the n-word but dripping with just as much contempt. They will then, without batting an eye, insist that they aren’t racist, normally while insisting that anyone who says otherwise is the true racist (eye-roll).

Unfortunately, racist trolls aren’t just an online issue. Racial-slur-laced meltdowns caught on camera are almost always followed up with the Karen or Ken involved releasing a statement about how “non-racist” they really are. Instead, they’ll say, just like the recent mass shooter in Atlanta, that they were just having a bad day.

I actually encountered this exact kind of thing in my high school days when I overheard classmates bragging about committing horrific hate crimes (assaulting minorities while yelling racial slurs) who then maintained that they weren’t racists. These types of “non-racists” aren’t delusional; they’re white supremacists, which is to say hate-filled people with bad characters who are, of course, capable of telling blatant lies.

“Here’s a simple tip: you cannot side with white supremacists on any issue involving race without also supporting white supremacy.”

The denial of what is plainly obvious is the bread and butter of bigots like Donald Trump, Tucker Carlson, and Sen. Tom Cotton and is why they’re the poster boys of the first group. Never mind that in their cases white supremacist groups view them as ardent supporters of white supremacy, as do Black people. While one would think that when a person’s level of racism can be triangulated using both the Klan and Black people, it would be the end of the debate, these self-proclaimed “non-racists” remain consistent that only they can out themselves.

These unprincipled, uncompassionate people that make up this first group, however, don’t tell their lies for my benefit or to fool or persuade the average person of color. They do it for the only audience for whom such laughably ridiculous claims have any real chance of appealing to and that’s the other group of “non-racist” whites: the delusional “non-racists”.

Because they view being called racist as being worse than racism, many delusionally “non-racist” people insist they shouldn’t be judged by their words and actions. Instead, they demand that racism be treated the way a person’s sexuality should be: as something that emanates from within and that a person should get to determine entirely for themselves. This is why many delusional “non-racists” regularly come to the defense of racist trolls simply on the basis that they denied being racist.

Racism, however, unlike sexuality, isn’t an inherent quality; it’s the result of countless external influences and manifests itself in numerous ways both large and small. But according to the flawed understanding of these delusional people, being racist is a yes or no proposition that involves an all-consuming hate, the n-word, and pointy-white hoods, so they’re off the hook. I suspect the reason they’re so resistant to any self-reflection is because of this belief that racism is an immutable characteristic rather than something that can be changed or overcome when acknowledged and honestly dealt with.

This avoidance means that many are basically saying, “I’m not drunk because other people are falling-over wasted.” But just like with being drunk, racism isn’t something that only exists in its most extreme forms. It is a spectrum on which a person can be intoxicated long before they’re aware of it and where a person can be making others uncomfortable even if they’re unable to realize how their behavior is impacting others.

Like a wasted person sitting at a bar slurring their words while talking about how they’re fine to drive, what a person is communicating to the sober world when they say they aren’t racist, assuming they sincerely mean it and aren’t a lying-ass racist troll, is that they don’t know how they look. They’re saying they’ve put so little time into learning, thinking about, and understanding one of the foundational elements of this country that they are completely ignorant about what it is, how it works, and how it has morphed itself in order to carry on. In short, they don’t know how strong the drink is they’ve been sipping on.

Take, for example, “the least racist guy on earth” I went to high school with, who, along with defending his friends who committed hate crimes back in the day, found his grandfather's KKK membership card while cleaning up his family’s farmhouse. In spite of the clear connection his family had to racism, and despite regularly making racially offensive comments, he insisted he was “color-blind”. And he said this despite not being able to point to a single thing he or his father had done to counter his grandfather’s influence in their lives when I asked him about it. They weren’t as drunk as him, and that meant they were sober.

Similar to this country boy, Prince William, in defense of the Royal family, recently said they weren’t racist. Let’s take a second to think about the lack of self-awareness this comment packs. His recently deceased grandfather, who was known for saying racially cringe-worthy things, was literally older than India and all the African countries the Family felt entitled to subjugate. Is William really trying to say his colonizer grandparents weren’t able to pass down a little of that mindset to him? Regardless, the entire institution of the Royals is predicated on the idea that their blood literally makes them superior to everyone else on Earth, yet he’ll still sit here and say he’s not racist while living in a palace built with the wealth stolen from people he and his grandparents believe they are superior to.

While we’re speaking of racist grandparents, many lovers of the confederacy also say they’re not racist while sharing many overlapping views with white supremacists including ones about the need for racist symbols to stay up. Regardless of the justifications these people profess, at the end of the day, Black people and white supremacist groups again agree the statues are important symbols to the Klan, and yet these “non-racist” people stand firmly on the side of the KKK and other hate groups in demanding they be left up. (Here’s a simple tip: you cannot side with white supremacists on any issue involving race without also supporting white supremacy.)

I do understand that given how barbarically low the bar was set by previous generations, many white people can effortlessly view themselves as an improvement on their ancestors, but raising a bar set so embarrassingly low is not the mark of progress these “racism-free” people want it to be. Just because someone’s father went out drunk driving every night doesn’t mean someones not following in his footsteps because they only drunk drive on the weekends.

Perhaps the first group of gaslighting “non-racists” is worse than the delusional ones, but they are the same when it comes to only putting effort into defending themselves against accusations of racism and derailing any efforts to solve the actual problem. So when I hear someone say “I’m not racist,” the only real question that remains for me is are they naively dangerous or sadistic? But does it really matter when both are locked arm-in-arm in support of each other?